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poetry
July 2009 
So, this is life...
Posted on May 13th, 2007
by 
Loni Love
Loni Love
Today is Mother's Day. It was Marcy's first. I am officially the last woman in my family without children. It feels weird. It doesn't feel weird, like, I want a baby weird. It just feels weird, I'm not in the club weird. We had a barbecue at Phil's house. It was the first family event orchestrated by me, and it went off really well. The food was amazing! I never knew my Dad had such a way with a grill. Marcy, and Pauline, and Mama, and Tat were all showered with love like no other. Everyone got a chance to see the babies. Fonz mostly played with his dog who he was SO happy to have along. Then at the end everyone pitched in to get the place looking clean again, packed up their doggy bags, and headed off out into their life knowing how much they are loved. I really love my family. Oh, and side note, I got to wear a REALLY pretty dress that matched perfectly with my new favorite shoes. I felt pretty today.
I have been spending a lot of time on Zaadz discussing my beliefs and my writing with some incredible people. I do quite a bit more reading than writing, but it seems to balance itself out. I even have a sort of pen pal who wants to discuss Conversations with God (which I barely remember reading) with me to see where our beliefs are different, where they are the same, and just have one of those loving, accepting, always blows me out of the water kind of conversations. I am looking forward to it quite a bit. I have returned to my favorite online poetic community to find it very much altered. The format, the guidelines are altered, but the people feel as much like home as ever. I still have not posted anything new. An event in which I get hurt very badly is usually followed by a way too long period of extreme caution. I am trying to break out of that. I am doing some things to get me out of my comfort zone. The last thing that I want is to walk around making decisions out of fear for the next two years.
The Air Force is fast approaching. I am going to need a lot of prayer.....Also, I need to get up off of my lazy ass, and get ready. I keep thinking about it. No thinking, thinking is my enemy when it comes to the Air Force. I need much, much less thinking, and much, much more doing. Here I am still trying to think it into submission. I am silly. So, this is life.
I have been spending a lot of time on Zaadz discussing my beliefs and my writing with some incredible people. I do quite a bit more reading than writing, but it seems to balance itself out. I even have a sort of pen pal who wants to discuss Conversations with God (which I barely remember reading) with me to see where our beliefs are different, where they are the same, and just have one of those loving, accepting, always blows me out of the water kind of conversations. I am looking forward to it quite a bit. I have returned to my favorite online poetic community to find it very much altered. The format, the guidelines are altered, but the people feel as much like home as ever. I still have not posted anything new. An event in which I get hurt very badly is usually followed by a way too long period of extreme caution. I am trying to break out of that. I am doing some things to get me out of my comfort zone. The last thing that I want is to walk around making decisions out of fear for the next two years.
The Air Force is fast approaching. I am going to need a lot of prayer.....Also, I need to get up off of my lazy ass, and get ready. I keep thinking about it. No thinking, thinking is my enemy when it comes to the Air Force. I need much, much less thinking, and much, much more doing. Here I am still trying to think it into submission. I am silly. So, this is life.
Access: Public
hi loni
are you joining the airforce? how come?
i agree dont think, but act. ironically the ultimate action is perception. like when those little men come and clear the red in your eyes.
there's something authentic in your voice…..